The past few weeks have been hectic for me. My daughter joined Shiamak’s Institute of Performing Arts for the Winter Funk 2008. The show is to be held on 30th November, 2008. I am really looking forward to it. So the last few days have been spent in running around for the costumes, coordinating with the tailor and getting my daughter to the class in the evenings.
But another thing that caught me in the middle of all this was the sad goings on at friends place. I understand that any relationship can have differences, especially marital ones. But when people go out of the way to make peoples lives miserable is what saddens me the most. Adults, capable of thinking clearly are hurting each other in unimaginable ways. This lady I know (let us call her Sunita) has been married for a decade. Has two kids. Is working. And tolerating crap from her husband throughout all these years.
I can’t imagine living like that. Not knowing when the next blow is coming from. Not knowing what is going to piss my husband so bad that he can beat me up brutally without caring a damn. What a terrible life that must be!
***And the best part is that there is really no problem. The only reason this man is doing all this is because of his inferiority complex. I feel if someone is feeling so low and is not able to get his sorry ass to do anything about it, he should just go kill himself. Why take it out on people around him?
Her husband (let us call him Suraj) has no intentions of giving up his sadistic ways. He has told so rather openly. Recently, things got so bad that Sunita was pushed to the brink. She even contemplated involving the cops. But the law of our land seems more kind to the criminals (Yes, there are a lot of officials really interested in doing their jobs but that is another story all together). The few friends she confided in told her that to avoid filing an FIR, the cops would do anything. An FIR means that they would have to get off their backsides and actually do something about the case at hand. Yes, that would also mean that they would jail him without too many questions asked. Now Sunita was not sure she wanted all this. But she did want a divorce.
All I know is that, divorce is a really big thing and if she had thought things through and if she really wanted to go through with it. The kids no matter how many parental fights they have witnessed are going to torn apart, when they know that one parent is not going to be around. They already have their head all messed up and they are going to need all the love that they can get. But the peace that comes with knowing that you can really relax in your own home without being beaten up, is truly worth it all. And I am rooting for her. I feel 10 years is too long for somebody if they really wanted to reform themselves.
And as I write this blog, I feel terrible sorrow for the way our country is being attacked brutally. And I feel that *** (4th Para) applies here too. I feel that Suraj too is like a terrorist, terrorizing his family. And when we allow it to breed, it takes ugly forms such as these. When we allow our kids to beat up other kids, telling ourselves and them that after all they are kids and they will grow out of it. When we say terrible things to our loved ones without ones thinking about the consequences of those words. When we do not teach our kids compassion……
Do we really need all this ugliness? Amongst all the existing ugliness, do we need to further complicate our lives? Can we just not live and let others live?
